All my life I have felt different. I realized this at age 4, when I could already read and write using a typewriter. This was the early 80’s so I didn’t have a computer yet. In kindergarten I used to drink coffee with the staff, as I found adults more interesting to have conversations with.

Hanging out with other occultists is useful, and working with known esoteric systems creates a bridge language to conversate with. Chaos magickians suffer from the problem that their world view is only relevant to the individual, as every Chaos Magickian has his/her own worldview. It is still possible to relate certain fragments that the candidate has embedded into his own system.

I find my interpretation of Luciferianism not to be a complete magickal system by itself, so I must use other systems for that. Mystically I can work with any paradigm, but dogma is not important, so the role of Lucifer in the mainstream Christian bible and modern interpretation of Lucifer as Satan, simply is irrelevant, save only for its role in defining my direction as “something dark and different”.

To a mainstream Christian, my Luciferianism is simply a message “stay away”. Suits me fine, but is no starting point for conversations.

To an Occultist, they tend to confuse my style with Thelema or OTO, which is also not entirely right, but not entirely wrong. No member of OTO, but still I have OTO people in my circle of friends.

I find more and more that even though I have many things to discuss with Occultists, having initiated knowledge of esoteric systems, I remain different and I cannot really get other occultists to understand exactly what I am doing from any of the known and published reference points out there.